The relationship with our mothers changes over the years. At first as little babies it is more than clear that we constantly need our mothers. They take care of us, our health, our food, and so on. It is not that you have another choice, we are completely dependent on the mother. Then, as a teenager, you get angry at her, get into arguments with her, and feel that she does not understand you. Once you move, you realize how much you really need her and how important she is to you.
The mother falls in love with you after she finds out that she is pregnant and that you are growing in her womb. When you are a baby you have no other choice. You are completely dependent on your mother. She cares about you, your food that is the best in the world for you, as well as its smell that is irreplaceable, her warm embrace. Her warm embrace and calm voice is what can calm you down when you cry as if the whole world has collapsed on you. In this period of your life, your mother is your superhero, the one who is by your side all the time and you do not want anyone else to take her place. Her eyes are the ones you look at constantly, they look at you with a kind and warm look, her hands are the ones that calm you down, her voice that you want to hear constantly.
When you grow up and become a teenager, you start to hate your mother. You don’t really hate her, but you often get into arguments with her, you often get angry at her choices, you feel that you now have a choice and that you can decide for yourself and that you are old enough to be your own person. You feel at times that you do not need it. She is the culprit for the things in your life that are not going well. She is the one who will deter you from the decision to dye your hair, you do not understand why she constantly scolds you when you use your mobile phone during a meal, you do not understand why she tells you that some of your friends are not good company etc. The truth is that you still need it, but you are not aware that it is so. In those days when you do not hate her, you consider her your best friend, the one you can rely on and cry over your problems. When you are disappointed in a boy or break up with him, she is the only person who will give you sincere support and a shoulder to cry on. You realize that she can listen to you and give you advice when it is most needed, and even though you know that you need her very much and that you love her, you will never admit it to her or to yourself.
The moment when you begin to realize how much you actually need it is after you become an adult and move out of the house. Maybe the reason for moving is to become independent, maybe because of studying in another city, no matter what the reason, you realize how much you need your mother. The very distance that exists between you makes you understand how close you need it and how much it means to you. Then you realize that she is a human being just like you, who has flaws and advantages, who makes mistakes but also makes the right decisions. Although you say that it is boring when she calls you constantly and writes you messages, still when something new happens in your life you first want to share it with her. When you go to a new job interview, or start working in a new job, with excitement you first tell her. In those moments you realize how much you really miss your mother and you realize that she is a huge and very important part of your life.
Once you become a mother and start a family, you will understand your mother even better. You understand the things she did better, you understand the words she told you better, you understand why she did not allow you to do certain things, why she did not allow you to dye your hair as a teenager, why she scolded you when you used your mobile phone during lunch etc. You start to understand her better and you start to become like her. You start doing almost the same things with your child, things she did with you. And you understand better. At certain moments when parenting becomes difficult and when you feel that you carry the whole burden of the family on your back, you realize again how much you need her and that she was in the same situation once, but you did not see it that way. You need her words of comfort and her strength to get you through difficult times. It is the force that moves you forward and gives you the strength to pass it on to your children. Again, even though you are an adult, you need her very much.
Even when you grow old, you realize that at some point you would like your mother to be there to support you and to be by your side. Although you already have enough years and experience, the desire and need for her presence does not pass. She may no longer be alive, but you realize that the mother is the one who has always been there for you and will be, even if she is not physically present. It leaves you with something you can rely on even when she is gone, it is her experience, her words and her upbringing. No matter how old you are, the mother is one and only and you will always need her!
